Going Dutch

"Going Dutch" refers to each person involved in a transaction contributing to the total sum by dividing the amount among the people equally, rather than one person paying for it entirely.

Today was going to be an awesome day for two reasons; firstly, my company was going to give us a vacation starting from tomorrow, and secondly, for the first time in 5 years, I was going to meet my cousins for dinner! 

 

Ever since I moved to this state, my days have just been full of meetings, breathing, and more meetings. Especially this year, we worked on a new project and it was literally hell. Even our vacations were short lived, unlike the one that would start tomorrow, which would last for a whole fortnight. 

 

So I left my place in a very happy and cheerful mood, very hopeful and excited.

 

 

***

 

 

After work was over, I quickly went home to freshen up. 5 whole years! Even though we're all grown up now, I just couldn't stop thinking about how much they'd have changed; both physically and mentally, as people. 

 

In all these years, we only talked to wish each other on birthdays, but that was all. Sometimes I regret having shifted here because somewhere at the back of my head, I felt like I had lost that bond with them.

 

I finally reached the restaurant across my building, and sent them the location. They said they'd reach in 10 minutes, and so I waited for them.

 

As I ordered some garlic bread, they walked right into the restaurant. It wasn't very cinematic, but happened anyway. Josh, the elder one, hadn't changed as much physically, but Chris had gone full on hair-dye; his hair was  now light brown, and it surprisingly suited him well.

 

I greeted them, and we talked about the most significant events of the past 5 years- which were basically all of us getting jobs. Chris was working for a marketing firm, and Josh was the owner of a publishing house. And me? I was a software engineer, just like everybody else.

 

After 10 minutes of making sure we hadn't missed out on much, we called the waiter for our order. Josh and Chris ordered separate pizzas for each other, but didn't seem like they'd be able to finish them by themselves. So I told them I'd share their order.

 

Eventually, everyone ended up eating some slices from both pizzas. 

 

And that's when I noticed the absolute animals that they were.

 

Josh ate 3 entire medium crust pizza slices from his own order, and 2 other ones from his brother's. And his brother too ate 4 from his own and 3 from Josh's.

 

I don't know about other people, but that's definitely a huge no-no for me.

 

After our chats, food and drinks were done, we asked the waiter for the bill. As the nearest one started walking towards our table, Josh told us about his little secret: he had gotten a singular note, as he "knew" he wouldn't go above the budget.

 

Chris looked mildly annoyed upon hearing this, but didn't say much. He just nodded and looked at the bill. The total was $36.66, and so I thought we could split it among ourselves.

 

"Oh ho! Look who sits peacefully watching us quarrel! You sly cheapskate!" Josh snarled, and held his demanding glare, almost threatening me.

"Look Josh, I think we should split the bill three ways equally and just get it over with." I said, nervous as hell on the inside.

"Not happening! I knew it! You had that extra slice! You know what? I'm not even going to pay a penny extra!" He once again, fumbled with his calculator, slammed his note onto the table and walked out the door without looking back.

 

"What's wrong with him?" I asked Chris, still shaken. 

"Oh no, don't you try to gain any sympathy from me, you know what you did."

And saying so, he too calculated his share and left the restaurant.

 

I couldn't believe any of that actually happened, it was all so sudden, and a LOT to take in. I looked at their calculations and stopped to think for a second.

Not only was their way of calculating wrong, but they had also hustled me! Josh payed less than he should've, Chris too did the same, and in the end, the one with the highest contribution was ME.

 

And if that wasn't enough, Josh didn't even pay for his water! 

 

"Well, well, well...." I muttered, and pulled out the remainder of the amount, and walked back to the exit.

 

Before I could head out, I heard the waiter call my name in anger. "Hey you! Mr Davies! This isn't real money!! These are printed paper sheets!"

 

I tried to process what he said, but before I could, my gaze shifted towards the television set in front of me.

 

 [Headlines: "The Davies-Dinner-Thieves  are back on tour!"

 "Sources have found footage showing the two infamous "dinner thieves", Josh and Chris Davies, entering the city at 10:34am today! Looks like someone is going to have a per-slice bill pay tonight!"]

 

Well, we're definitely not going Dutch for this one....